Chrysalis
by Alexandra Lynch
Summary: (H/G slash) Sequel to Angels Will Fall. Discovering who you love is just the beginning of discovering what you will become.
1. Default Chapter

Chrysalis  
  
Hermione came out of the pleasant trance that she always fell into when writing about something she knew well, and took a deep breath. That took care of the Arithmancy assignment due on Tuesday, and....really, she found, she was tired. She looked at a clock, conveniently placed, and realized that wasn't surprising, considering that it was nearing midnight, and she'd had a long day. The thought made her grin, a memory-of-delight grin that wasn't her style at all, and would have surprised her friends if they'd seen it. She scooped her books back into their bag, and set off back to Gryffindor Tower.  
  
There weren't many people still around; curfew was midnight on the weekends, and anyone still up would be back in their dorms and common rooms. She passed a couple stragglers, Hufflepuff from the house scarves wrapped around their necks, who were on their way up from a late stroll, hands clasped in a decorous fashion that wouldn't get them in trouble. The sight brought back memories of the afternoon. She laughed to herself as she climbed the staircase. It hadn't been what she expected.  
  
Ginny Weasley. First a scrawny red-haired tagalong, and then the fourth in her and Ron and Harry's exploits, and the first real female friend that Hermione had had. In school she'd always been rather foreign to the other girls with her intelligence and dedication to her work and to the pursuit of knowledge, and that hadn't much changed when she came to Hogwarts. But Ginny was equally dedicated, if not perhaps possessed of the blinding leaps of intelligence Hermione had. She made up for it with hard work and a stubbornness that went with her hair, and their friendship had been nurtured at the same table in the library in silence just as much as it had been in companionship in the same House.  
  
Ginny had been distant over the last year, and bitchy over the week she'd spent with the Weasleys before start of fall term. Hermione hadn't paid it much attention, wrapped up as she was in her own issues, and had muddled through fall term trying to date Seamus and pretend that she was just like the other girls. Seamus had seen through it, though. He'd shattered the illusion that she could fake it with a few compassionate words, and then, when she had hidden herself in her room to cry, Ginny had shattered the illusion that she didn't know what she wanted.  
  
She knew now. She wanted Ginny, slender and possessed of sleek curves like a cat, and long soft red hair that had twined about them both earlier that day, passionate and firey in word and thought and deed. And now that the paper that Hermione had promised herself she'd write today was done....she had time to play. The thought made a soft warmth begin in her stomach, and she bounded up the last step and jauntily gave the password to the Fat Lady.  
  
The common room was crowded and noisy tonight, filled with a discussion about the Quidditch match tomorrow, a loud game of Exploding Snap, and a game of wizard chess in which the spectators were making more noise than the players...apparently there was a bet on. She didn't notice. Her eyes were fixed on the slender figure in a large chair in the corner, reading a book and oblivious to the noise of the room. And somehow, Ginny chose that moment to look up, and the smile that lit her face was like sunlight for a moment before she dimmed it and cast a glance over to where Ron, oblivious to all but the next move, was scowling over his chess pieces and ignoring the comments of those watching him. Hermione walked over.  
  
"Hey," she said.  
  
"Hey, " said Ginny, color springing up in her cheeks involuntarily. "You, um, get everything written?"  
  
"Ready to go for Tuesday morning."  
  
They looked at each other for a moment, and then Ginny stood up, closing her book. "Let's go in your room, okay? I can't hear myself think out here."  
  
Hermione led the way.  
  
They sat down together on Hermione's bed, in lieu of a sofa, and Ginny darted a glance out of the corner of her eye at Hermione that sent them both into gales of laughter.  
  
"You could be a little more formal, there, Hermione, you know, " she finally gasped out.  
  
"Yeah, well, I didn't think a full kiss in the middle of everything was how you wanted to come out to the world!" Taking a deep breath, Ginny nodded. "We really should think about that.. I mean, I'm not good at pretending anything except, um, fascination with you." She blushed. "It's been hell, you know." "And I didn't know..." said Hermione, thoughtfully. "Amazing. But at least I figured it out now." The warm light of Ginny's smile answered that, and there was silence for a moment.  
  
After a long moment of just looking at each other, a question occured to Hermione. "Are you gonna catch any flack from your folks?"  
  
Ginny shook her head, with a grin. "I don't think so, considering that Bill's gay."  
  
Hermione's jaw dropped. "BILL?!?"  
  
"Yep," said Ginny, enjoying Hermione's shock. "He'd been dating this one guy he met in Egypt, but I think they broke up last summer, and I haven't heard anything about him having a new boyfriend yet. Mom and Dad are cool with it... they're big on Being Who You Are and stuff, and so beyond Percy being an ass about it, everyone else is cool with it."  
  
Hermione snorted inelegantly. "Percy is an ass about EVERYTHING. Was he born with that broom handle up his ass, or what?"  
  
"Always been like that since I can remember," Ginny said, idly playing with the tuft on the end of her braid, which she had draped over her shoulder. "No, the only thing I can think of is that I might get some flack from Mum just because of the whole "now she'll never get married and have grandbabies!" thing, but I intend to point out that I can have babies without -marrying- a guy, so it should be fine. " She paused, and then said, "How bad is it going to be for you, you think?"  
  
Hermione's eyes went dark and remote, and she pulled her knees up and hugged them like a child. "I... God, I can't even imagine telling them I'm gay." She shivered, and went on in a strained voice. "When I go home, my mother's always telling me to get out and meet people. All my life, I was taking lessons and joining things not because I wanted to, but because I'd be playing with the right sort of kids and learning the right things. Every letter from home asks questions about who I'm dating, and if I am and I mention a name, they're all over me to find out who he is and is he from a good family...I hated to think about bringing any guy home or he'd get the third degree. And Father... well... he's really oldfashioned."  
  
"Oh, like 'you haven't met the right man' sort of stuff?" said Ginny, moving over to slide an arm around Hermione's shoulders. The older girl sighed and leaned into the hug.  
  
"They don't much hug, either, or talk about love and such. I'm glad we can talk."  
  
"We've always been able to talk. Why should it change just because you and I are... Are we, um, you and I?" Ginny blushed red again, and Hermione smiled.  
  
"If you want to be...I...well..." She trailed off in confusion that made Ginny feel both happy and a little worried.  
  
"Um, can I tell you a story?" Ginny said. At Hermione's nod, she continued. "My mum and dad met at Hogwarts, you know... and they were in Gryffindor, same as us, and, well, mum and dad have both said that one day they just looked up at this friend of theirs and wham, they just knew this is it, this is the person they were going to marry and spend the rest of their lives with. They're always on all of us to date, but, you know... I'm a lot like my dad."  
  
Hermione nodded, and looked shyly over at the other girl. "Me too....that was what I was trying to say, but I was thinking, it's too early to know..."  
  
"No it's not," said Ginny, with a smile. "But let's promise that if things change for either of us, we talk about it, okay? Cause, you know, I don't want to lose you as a friend if we stop dating."  
  
"I agree, " said Hermione. "So... I suppose we better tell Harry and Ron sooner rather than later, huh?"  
  
"Probably. Otherwise we'll get yelled at and all that. Since Ron's my brother and all."  
  
They giggled. Hermione looked at Ginny and said, in an elaborately casual tone, "You know, the party's still raging out there...."  
  
"This is true. You know, I don't see how, even if I went to my dorm, I could sleep a wink for a couple hours at least."  
  
"Hmm..." said Hermione. "I wonder if we could find anything to do while we wait for them to get tired?" The question was patently false, considering the light of sensual mischief in her face. "I think I've got an idea or two," Ginny said, tracing the curve of Hermione's ear, and seeing her shiver with pleasure and anticipation. She leaned over, bit the lobe gently, and whispered in her ear, "but I think we're both overdressed for it..."  
  
Hermione took a deep breath to focus, grabbed her wand, and cast the fastest locking and silencing spells on her door that she'd ever performed. 


	2. A Letter From Home

Monday morning  
  
"Hermione, incoming," called Ron, just in time for Hermione to catch the letter before it fell into her cereal bowl.  
  
"From my mother and father," she said, glancing at it, then stuffing it into her book bag and going back to eating.  
  
"What, not going to open it?" asked Harry.  
  
"Nah," said Hermione, casually, scooping up the last of her oatmeal. "I can tell you exactly what it says. How am I doing in school, and why is it I didn't get a perfect grade on my last Potions assignment, after all they expect better from me, and from what they've learned the Finnegans are nice people but really, after all, not quite the best type....Seamus, I told you they were snobs, didn't I? Don't look so stricken!...and I do want to be careful and not settle for anything less than I deserve, and by the way here's a little spending money, write back soon and in detail, Love, Mother." Her voice was rich with sarcasm, and the surrounding people chuckled.  
  
"Well, let's see if you're right, hm?" said Ginny, holding out a hand. Hermione looked at her, grinned, and said, "Okay..." and produced the letter.  
  
She opened it, read it through, and then began to read it aloud.  
  
Dear Hermione: Your last letter didn't say as much as usual about how you were doing with your schoolwork. I'm a little worried about your grade on your last assignment in Potions; I know you've said you have issues with the Professor, but, really, haven't we taught you that personality conflicts are just part of life, and that you need to succeed in spite of that? We expect you to do all that you can, as you always have. I was glad to hear of your success in Arithmancy, and hope that this interest in an extra credit project means that you are considering the field for future study; from what I hear, arithmancy's an excellent major in college."  
  
"You're in SIXTH YEAR!" said Harry.  
  
"Yeah, I know," said Hermione, with a sour look, and nodded at Ginny to get on with it.  
  
"Also, my source informs me that more men than women go into the professions that use it, so that means that when you are ready to marry you'll have a considerable pool to choose from. It's easier to listen to a man talk about his work if you have studied it also, and many men prefer intelligent women, as long as she is able to also listen to him and put his needs first. "  
  
"Oh, good lord," said Ron. "Like you're worried about that NOW."  
  
Hermione rolled her eyes and nodded to Ginny.  
  
"Speaking of your personal life, dear, I'm sure that this Finnegan boy is quite nice and all, and of course I'm all for having friends, but really, dear, Irish? I'm sure that you will be able to discern the right course for yourself. After all, you don't want to be in the same position your cousin found herself in, now, do you?"  
  
The boy in question was snorting and choking with laughter, and turning quite red. "What happened to your cousin?" Harry asked, grinning broadly himself.  
  
"Oh, she married a plumber and has three kids," Hermione said. "Mother's quite willing to call him up on his day off and have him come fix her loo, but otherwise she's busy pretending they don't exist."  
  
Ginny went on. " In other news, your father wasn't feeling well and so I took him to his doctor last week. He ordered some tests, and it turned out that your father's got at least one blocked artery, and from the scan has already had one minor attack. I knew instantly that it was that bad attack of indigestion I wrote you about last month. I don't want you to worry or feel you need to come home, by any means; your father's under the very best care we can find, and is back to complaining about the state of the country."  
  
Hermione had turned white, but then normal color came back into her face. "Oh....well, at least it's being taken care of. Poor Father! But if he's complaining again he feels okay."  
  
"You will find enclosed a little something, which I'm sure you can find a use for. Take care of yourself, and as always, we love you. Mother and Father."  
  
Ron grinned. "Well, good thing we didn't have a bet down. Apart from that stuff about your dad, you had it perfect. IS he going to be okay?"  
  
"Yeah, the muggle medicines are pretty good. Assuming he'll take them. Assuming he'll follow the diet he's supposed to be on." She sighed. "One more thing to worry about."  
  
"What do you mean?" said Harry.  
  
Hermione looked around at everyone. "Um, I'll tell you later." And she stuck to it, too, despite attempts from Ron and Harry to pry it out of her before they all scattered to class.  
  
That night, once the common room had emptied, Ron and Harry ambushed Hermione and Ginny on their way back in from the library.  
  
"Okay," said Harry, "it's later. We're the only ones in here, and I'd like to hear what's going on. And soon, please, since I've got an early class tomorrow."  
  
"You've been acting strangely the last few days, Hermione," said Ron, "and that's not like you. What's up, did you break up with Seamus?"  
  
Ginny and Hermione exchanged glances, and Hermione nodded. Good a time as any. And they DID ask. She sat down on a sofa, Ginny beside her, and waved the other two down to a seat across from them.  
  
"Yes, Seamus and I broke up." She held up a hand to divert an outburst from Ron, and said, "It was his idea, but when I had a chance to think about it I agreed with him and would have done it myself. We're still friends, so don't you go being nasty to him. He's a nice guy."  
  
"Okay, that covers this weekend," said Harry.  
  
Ginny spoke up. "Ah, something you two should know.... I'm not particularly interested in spreading it all over the school, but...um, Ron? Bill's not the only one who's gay in our family." She sat back and let him figure it out, and got more than a little amusement out of the expression on his face.  
  
"Oookay..." said Harry, shaking his head. "That would explain why you haven't been dating anyone."  
  
"That," Ginny said, "and I did have an... interest, I just didn't think she was interested in me in return."  
  
"But I figured out Saturday that I was," said Hermione, and took Ginny's hand in an unmistakeable "we-are-a-couple" gesture. Both boys' mouths were hanging open. Finally, Ron started to laugh. "Well, I suppose I don't need to ask if you would be interested in going to the Valentine's Day dance with me, then!" he said, through his gasps. "Of all the things...but, you know," he said, looking at her with more perception than she'd given him credit for, "you've not been just one of the girls for a long time, maybe ever. It's not just that you're smart, either. But, well, I'm glad you worked it out, and I'm still your friend."  
  
"Me too," said Harry. "That... wasn't what I expected. From either of you."  
  
"Oh, for heaven's sake," said Ginny with a shadow of her mother's tone. "Did you expect me to cut my hair and dress like a guy? That's not me."  
  
Harry turned red. "I know, but... oh, to hell with it. It's going to take some getting used to, but I still like you both. Just for the record and all." He rose. "And I've got practice in the morning, so I'm going to bed. Good night, all."  
  
Ron was still looking at Ginny as if she'd sprouted an extra arm when he wasn't looking. She finally stood up and slapped him lightly on the head. "Oh, Ron. Go play chess against yourself and let your brain settle." But she kissed the top of his head, and smiled at him when he looked up at her. He grinned back.  
  
"I'm going to bed myself, " said Hermione. "I've got Advanced Transfiguration in the morning, and if I'm tired I'll screw things up."  
  
"Me too," said Ginny. She walked up the stairs to the dorm with Hermione, and was surprised when, at the bend where no one up or down could see them, the older girl stepped down one step to put them level, and kissed her until she was weak in the knees.  
  
"Sleep well, " she said, with a giggle, and was up and unlocking her door before Ginny could climb the next step.  
  
"Paybacks are hell," said Ginny, but smiled as Hermione shut her door. She undressed, tugged the curtains around her bed, and, for all that she was feeling anything but tired after that kiss, fell asleep in record time. 


	3. Decisions Looming

For all that Ginny and Hermione had been keeping things quiet, eventually people started to notice that something was going on. Harry and Ron, when asked, told the querents to go talk to Hermione or Ginny themselves. A slow wave of surprise, a small amount of discomfort (chiefly from Lavender and Parvati) and some resettling of attitudes followed throughout Gryffindor Tower. Ginny, after about four false starts and a lot of staring out the window, wrote a letter home, and got one back in return that had her dashing out of breakfast in tears. "It's not bad," she told Hermione, when she caught up with her in a corner, "it's just...Mum's way of saying it, you know? And, she said that you would be welcome at The Burrow anytime you wanted to come home with me." The letter brought tears to Hermione's eyes, too. She found herself thinking about the approaching Easter vacation, and trying out conversations in her mind. They all fell flat. How do you tell your parents that you're gay? That she didn't know. But editing her weekly letter home was hard. Her initial impulse would have had Ginny's name in every line, the sparkle of a new love affair shining from between the lines in a way no one could miss. The letters she did wind up sending were colder and choppier, and the letters in return took on a more complaining tone. Hermione began to dread mail call.  
  
Easter holiday was looming, and she was still no nearer a resolution. She would go home, and fake it, she decided, finally, and let it be. It wasn't like it was summer, or anything, she could manage for one week, surely....Besides, midterm exams were coming up. Those were enough to distract anyone.  
  
She was sitting in Potions class, listening to Snape lecture, when she felt...eyes on her. Slowly, slowly, under cover of retrieving a dropped quill, she glanced over, and met the cool grey eyes of Draco Malfoy. He was looking at her with a lazy regard that somehow reminded her of a leopard looking at a distant deer, and she shivered.  
  
"Hey, guys, do I have something on my robes or a smudge on my face?" she asked, when they left.  
  
"No," said Harry, "why?"  
  
"Malfoy was staring at me all during class."  
  
"Um, no offense, Hermione," said Ron, "but, um, you're not exactly eleven anymore and, um...." he turned red, tied himself up in his words, and stopped in confusion. However, she got his message.  
  
"Yeah, well, maybe he IS looking at me. But, you know, I thought by now the word had got around to the other houses too, you know, about me not being interested in boys that way."  
  
"Yeah," said Harry. "You can send an owl to the Daily Prophet or you can drop a hint to Lavender and Parvati." They all laughed, and Hermione put it out of her head. Who knew what Malfoy was thinking, anyway, pretentious asshole that he was.  
  
"You do know Mum would love to have you at The Burrow," said Ginny, as they walked down to Hogsmeade to catch the train. Hermione sighed.  
  
"I know. But I've got some things to talk over with my parents, and I want to see how my father's doing. If it gets too bad, I'll come over. I've got Floo powder, after all."  
  
They were very carefully not touching, although the electricity between them was nearly visible, and hadn't been much diminished by their lovemaking of the night before. Hermione thrust her worries down and away, and found herself laughing at Harry and Ron's stories. They always can make me laugh, she thought with affection, as the compartment door opened to reveal Draco Malfoy standing there.  
  
He had not changed, essentially, over the years, although he had learned to conceal his prejudices and narcissism under a facade of charm, when he so chose. Physically, he favored his father, being moderately tall and lean, and he wore his long blond hair tied back most of the time. His grey eyes were cool and contemptuous, but there was a flicker of something else as they passed over Hermione and Ginny.  
  
"What do YOU want, Malfoy?" said Ron, looking at him with distaste.  
  
Draco just laughed, unpleasantly. "Merely amusing myself by watching the unexceptional in pursuit of the unachievable. Or did Granger turn queer because of your inept attempts?"  
  
Ron went red, and Harry went white, and Hermione couldn't speak for sheer shock. Draco smiled slightly, and continued.  
  
"You know, Granger, if you ever want to try a real man, I'd be delighted to show you how it works...or you, Weasley," he said, his cool eyes raking Ginny with a slow insolence that brought a growl from her brother.  
  
"I'd have to find one, first," she said, tone cool, although her eyes shot fire. "You definitely don't qualify."  
  
"Get the fuck out, Malfoy," Potter said, back in command of his voice. "I don't feel like hexing you right now, and I'd hate to be put to the trouble."  
  
A small high flush appeared on Malfoy's cheekbones. The memory of the Furunculus Curse still lingered, mused Hermione, and smiled. He turned to her, irritated.  
  
"Go ahead, laugh now, you little mudblood dyke. You'll get yours, soon enough, and I'll enjoy every minute of it."  
  
And he banged the door behind him. Amid the angry words from Ron and Harry, and Ginny pointing out that she'd hex the first one of them that made a move to waste their time on such a stupid twit, Hermione worked on her shaking hands and roiling gut. Mudblood dyke. She hadn't realized that it would hurt so much when someone said it. She retreated to the loo, and cast a charm to calm herself....they were close to the station, after all, and she didn't want her mother to figure out that she was upset. She damn straight didn't want to discuss why.  
  
At the station, Ron and Harry piled out, giving them a bare second of privacy. "Take care," Ginny said, her eyes full of want and love and frustration.  
  
"I will," said Hermione, unable to look at her for wanting to cry. She pulled her calm, everything-is-normal facade about her, and walked out, not looking back.  
  
"Hello, dear," said her mother, giving her a quick and decorous embrace and peck on the cheek. "I thought we might get some tea before returning to the house. That way your father will be home when we get there, and I have a good supper planned."  
  
"That sounds lovely, Mother, " Hermione said, and felt very cold and chill inside. The undeniable rigid Muggleness of her family was already closing around her, and it didn't fit any more. It couldn't even pretend to fit. She knew that much already.  
  
* * *  
  
A/N: Don't worry, we're not done. Not by a long shot. Next one is titled "Realizations"...coming back to school with a new understanding of who you are, and making decisions about it. And yes, this version of Draco has him as a distinctly unpleasant person. What can I say....like father, like son. It's how he's acting here. 


End file.
